EMDR was developed as an evidence-based treatment for trauma that has gone unprocessed. You can read more about the basics of EMDR here. When it comes to religious trauma, EMDR can offer meaningful relief after years of triggers, overwhelm, and a dysregulated nervous system. 

Most people try to please others at some point. It’s a pretty human thing to do. But they’re usually doing it from a place of being in touch with their own needs, emotions, and sense of self-worth that transcends whatever they can do for another person. So what happens when someone isn’t?

When someone is in an abusive relationship, they might stay and try to “fawn” their abuser, making sure their meal is cooked by the time they get home, their favorite beer is fully stocked in the fridge, and their kids are put to sleep. They “fawn” so that their abuser doesn’t explode. It’s a protective mechanism to prevent their abuser from causing more damage.

Let’s say you’ve got a good handle on a couple of triggers you have. You thought you knew what put you in “The Bad Place,” but now you’ve got a couple more things that you’re aware of. Now you can recognize when you’re feeling terrible, and maybe even how you’re feeling, in general, a good amount of the time. That’s great! Let’s talk about actually *doing* all those things on that list.

You know most people think of productivity as doing the most at the flip of a switch. You also know that doesn’t describe you outside of the rare day you finish some things, but also go into that fuzzy space where fingernails magically get chewed off and you forget to feed yourself, let alone blink. And you know productivity should be attainable. It should account for people like you with PTSD.

Your brain is very good at scanning your environment, both internally and externally, for threats to your survival. In fact, it’s probably reacting to perceived threats most of the time you can’t seem to take that next step in your day. And that doesn’t make you “unproductive” or “lazy.” It just means your brain frequently has different goals than you want it to. But why is it so hard to be productive after trauma? Read more to learn why.

If or when you start dating, you may find that you and your partner have different backgrounds when it comes to romance, relationships, and sex. Let’s dive into the many things to think about when navigating the lasting effects of purity culture with a partner.

After leaving Purity Culture, the ambiguity we face after a loss of structure can feel debilitating. How do we relate to ourselves? How do we relate to others? There are no longer clear-cut answers about when you should have sex and what you should want from a relationship.

Purity Culture was typically closely connected with American Evangelical churches and ministries of the 80’s and 90’s. We are now learning how much damage purity culture has done to those trapped within it. Let’s talk about how to heal after leaving purity culture.

Couples therapy is meant to address issues in the relationship dynamic. Each person we interact with can bring out different sides of us and sometimes we notice that there are parts of us that get brought out in our romantic relationships that we want to address. We see couples come into couples therapy for many reasons. Let’s dive in!

At Woven, we offer couples intensives as an alternative to weekly couples therapy. Couples intensives include 6 hours of therapy over the course of a weekend, typically 3 hours on Saturday and 3 hours on Sunday (all virtual). Let’s dive in and see if couples intensives might be right for you.

We would define betrayal trauma as betrayal that occurs in a way that leads to more intense distress than just a feeling of betrayal. A friend canceling on you last minute may make you feel betrayed, but your brain most likely will not code that as trauma. However, finding out a partner cheated on you or experiencing sexual abuse from a family member will most likely result in betrayal trauma because the severity of the betrayal would probably present itself in intense distress for you.

Self-care is an essential component of any therapeutic process, and it's particularly important in couples therapy. There is a reason why flight attendants on airplanes instruct you to put on your own oxygen mask first before helping anyone else. If you aren’t able to take care of your well-being, you won’t be in any position to help anyone else.

Almost anything can become an issue in a relationship because issues arise when couples fail to understand one another, expectations go unmet, or you are unable to regulate in the midst of distress. However, there are three topics that tend to result in some of the biggest arguments amongst couples: finances, families, and sex. Let’s dive in.

Trauma-informed couples therapy is a therapeutic approach that takes into account the impact of past trauma on your current relationships and behaviors. It recognizes that trauma can affect your ability to trust, communicate, and connect with others, and seeks to address these challenges in a supportive and non-judgmental environment. Here are some potential benefits of trauma-informed couples therapy:

Today we will be talking about the relationship between trauma and substance use. Trauma can significantly impact your relationship to different substances, and the holidays can trigger substance use to cope with situations and surroundings. Since many people create intentions or goals at the beginning of the year, we want to provide you with some information about the connection between trauma and substance use in case you are thinking about your relationship with substance use.

Last week we talked about coping during the holidays. The holidays can be very stressful, but after the holidays can be stressful in a different way!

The holidays can be a challenging time for anyone, but they can be especially difficult for those who have experienced trauma. The holiday season is often associated with feelings of joy, love, and togetherness, but for those who have experienced trauma, these feelings can be overshadowed by painful memories and emotions, and can lead to dysregulation.

Who doesn’t love a good read? Our Woven therapists surely do! This week we are sharing some book recommendations that span all different genres.

Self-betrayal is a way of coping that many people develop to keep themselves safe and try to meet their needs. Individuals who experienced trauma as children may develop this type of response because they believed that it was the only way to stay connected to their caregivers. We dive into what self-betrayal may look like.